I first learned of Penny in early November of 2020, when the world was still in the midst of the Covid crisis. We had received an email from a partner shelter asking us if we would take in a puppy suffering from mange, a case we knew we could handle. But their reply came with an additional request: would we be willing to open our doors to one more?

Penny's plight had been emailed to various rescues, none of which could or would take her on. That's not to say it was a failing on their part; Penny had a lot going on and despite her great need, some rescues just don't have the resources to help. This led to her being the shelter's longest resident, and meant that she was running out of time. We learned that Penny was at least 10 years old, not spayed, heartworm positive, and had multiple growths on her body, including a pendulous growth that hung from her back leg. Taking on a dog like Penny was going to require more than routine care, and meant committing to significant medical treatment with no guarantees.

At this point, the only guarantee was that without us, she would die there. I looked at her photograph, and something in her eyes spoke to me - a quiet plea, a flicker of hope that deserved to be answered.

This couldn't be the end for her. We wouldn't let it be. So we said yes.

The pictures of Penny sent by the shelter

When Penny arrived, the neglect was impossible to ignore. Her teeth were worn down to nubs. Thick calluses had formed on her elbows, likely from years spent lying on concrete instead of something soft. And we could clearly see the masses, especially the one hanging heavily from her leg. Yet, despite her physical burdens, she was quiet and tolerant as we examined her, her soft gaze suggesting a profound trust in us. We had made her an appointment to get a complete checkup, hoping to be able to improve her health. We were particularly worried about the masses, as many of them were on her abdomen. With her being unspayed, the risk that it was mammary cancer was extremely high.

I decided to take her to the vet myself, and she rode shotgun with me the entire way. Because of Covid restrictions at the time, clients weren't allowed inside, so we had to wait in the car until a staff member came out to bring her in for her exam. There's something about waiting that makes everything feel suspended in time. As we sat in the car outside of the vet hospital, I watched her as she watched the movement around us, the doors opening and closing, and the people passing by. She was quiet and inquisitive, content to sit there beside me, her presence a gentle comfort. I took her picture, and her eyes were soft in a way that didn't match everything she had been through.

She didn't look at me like a dog who had been failed her entire life.

To this day, it's still one of my most memorable photos I've taken in all my years in rescue. Eventually they brought her inside, and a few hours later, we drove back to the rescue to wait for answers.

The way she looked at me that day

Answers came a few days later. The results confirmed her heartworm positive status, and changes in her body consistent with years of severe neglect and malnutrition. Most concerning were the masses on her body, which cytology indicated were possibly cancerous. While her case was complex, it was not without hope. After thorough discussion with the veterinary team, we decided to approach Penny's care conservatively. The immediate focus became stabilizing her health and giving her body time to recover with proper nutrition, medical support, and consistent care after years of neglect. Once she was stronger, we planned to remove the masses that began affecting her comfort and shift our focus fully to her quality of life.

After two months of steady improvement, we went forward with the surgery. By now her masses had grown and started to affect her quality of life. She was cleared by the vet and the procedure had gone smoothly without any issues. I was so hopeful that this would be the turning point for her. Given her age and the toll years of neglect had taken on her body, this would be it. After this, the plan would be to let her live out the rest of her life for whatever time she had left. Unfortunately, that wouldn't be the case. A few days after her surgery, Penny experienced post-operative complications that her body could not recover from. With her foster mom at her side, holding her and reminding her she was loved, we made the difficult decision to let her go.

I told myself, this wasn't supposed to happen. Penny was supposed to get her second chance and live out her life with new-found happiness. She was now safe, loved, and free from discomfort, so why did this happen? Did we make the wrong choice? I cried and struggled with what happened, but as I looked back at every choice we had made, I knew we did right by her. Every decision was made with guidance from her vet and her comfort at the center. She knew two months of happiness, she spent Thanksgiving and Christmas in a home, warm and fed, and loved. It was everything she never knew, and when I spoke with her foster mom and reflected on the life she had in those past two months, I knew we had changed her story. She didn't die an old, neglected dog nobody chose, or ever cared about. She left this earth with love, dignity, and finally knowing what it was like to be chosen.

And when I look at that picture now, I can see she already knew.

In memory of Penny & every dog who just needed someone to say yes,

Martha